What it all means...

What it all means to me. Yeesh…that’s a big topic, eh? A million philosophers pondering for a million years, and all that good stuff. No matter, that’s the subject that has been on my mind for a while now. We’ve pulled up stakes, and moved hundreds of miles away, leaving behind all that is comfortable and known. Michigan football. Hawaiians at Charley’s. Conor O’Neill’s. The hillbilly bar on I-94. The Blind Pig. State Street in Ann Arbor, Main Street in Royal Oak, Michigan Avenue in Dearborn. The bar that we met at. The condo that I proposed in. The church that we got married in. The friends and family that were with us through that journey and a hundred others.

All left behind. Why?

In the face of a question like that, I tempted to call on my inner Blutarsky and say “::Belch:: Why not?” Unfortunately, that answer just isn’t entirely satisfying when put up against a question of this magnitude.

To me, this trip represents a lot of new starts. First and foremost, it’s a new beginning for Erin and me. It’s funny to think of having a new start after six weeks of marriage, but it really is. Here, we don’t have a lot of our old outlets. I’m not heading to Comerica Park and the State Bar, and she isn’t going off to Big Boy. Even though we know a couple of people here, we really are on our own to begin with.

We have to rely on each other and be there for one another. Even though we can still stay in touch with our friends and family by e-mail and phone (and rambling blogs), we are really in this alone. It’s an exciting thought, even if it is a little scary. Am I going to be patient enough to help her though the feelings of loneliness? Am I going to grow too dependant on her? Are we going to drive each other nuts with our proximity?

It’s a real challenge for our relationship. The good thing is that I believe that we are strong enough to get through it, and to thrive. I think that being together in this situation is ultimately going to bring us closer together, and that’s something that I am really excited about.

We also get to make new memories in a new location. I look at a place like Conor O’Neill’s. That restaurant will always be special to me because we had our rehearsal dinner there. But I also think of nights that Brandon and I drank with Hart, Grouch, JT, and their associated women. I remember being out there with Bunn when he picked up a 40 year old woman. Every place in Ann Arbor has memories that precede our relationship. Now, every place we go to is a new experience, unique to us. I’ve loved hitting new restaurants on a whim and having the experience of loving or hating it not be influenced by past events. Even though I can’t wait to sit down at the Brown Jug and yell at Chandler for ordering P’zones, I’m thoroughly enjoying the process of exploration with her.

It’s not just our relationship that is facing a new start though. My career begins anew here. In Michigan, I was prepared to go to school on a full-time basis and find part-time work to learn new skills and improve myself. The idea was that in two years when I finish, there would be a better job market in the state, and I would be in a better position to take advantage of it.

Out here, however, jobs are abundant. Unemployment is low and economic growth is high…this helps to make for a much better job climate. In the last two weeks, I’ve applied to more jobs out here that I would be excited about than I did in two months of looking in Michigan.

What I hope this ultimately means is that I can take a job that I can succeed and learn in, while taking part-time classes at night. I won’t be trapped into taking a position that is not ideal just because I’m afraid that nothing else will come up. This should go a long way towards making me happier with my career (obviously).

I know that in our final months in Michigan, I was growing more and more frustrated at work, which was having a negative impact on my life. That’s gone now, and as long as I stick to the plan, it should be gone for good. The negative feelings and the perception of stagnation are gone, and I’m ready to really move things along. That is a tremendous feeling, and one that I worried I wouldn’t see for a long time in Michigan.

This move also represents a great opportunity for Erin. She is in a position of more responsibility, and one of greater opportunity. She gets to test herself again, and see how well she can grow a smaller office with big potential. If she is successful (and with her track record, I wouldn’t bet against it), the sky is the limit at her company. While some guys may have an issue with their wives being in a position of importance and greater financial means, I am all for it. Hey, if she makes VP at a good age, I’m lobbying to become a stay-at-home husband.

I’ve mentioned some of the challenges, and I don’t mean to downplay them. I know there will be tough times adjusting. I know there will be days that I hate my job. I know that things will happen that will make me ask why the hell we moved from such a comfortable location. I know this, and I’m still going on with it. I have a tremendous sense of optimism about how Erin and I will grow and adapt to these new challenges.

So really...in the end, what does this move mean to me? It means the chance to grow and learn and thrive and be happy with the woman I love. I know that the attitude I take through this journey will go a long way to determining how successful it is. I know that hope is a good thing…maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies.